Safe Love Over Toxic Love
Commentary and photo by Benji Mallory
Relationships are the state of being related or connected. To me this means that the love between two people is pure and that they enjoy each other's company all the time. When you have a partner you are supposed to enjoy the company, love and support that person brings you. There are different things that make a relationship work smoothly. Partners have to communicate, especially when it comes to dating an overthinker. To be loyal you have to be committed to wanting to keep the relationship an actual relationship.
Over time though, there have been some cases in which relationships have had so many problems that people are too scared to say anything which can lead to emotional and physical damage because the relationship is toxic. Many people are in unhealthy relationships and they just don’t even know. Websites that help with information on toxic relationships are https://healthscopemag.com and https:/www.psychalive.com.
In today’s world, the percentage of people in unhealthy relationships is at 60% and they stay in that relationship. It has also been proven that research shows 50 to 80% of adults may experience emotional damage from being emotionally abused in their relationships. A lot of people actually stay in toxic relationships because they don’t know anything better or they fear being judged by other people.
Ten Signs You’re In A Toxic Relationship:
You don’t feel safe AT ALL!!!
You have bad (or nonexistent) communication.
You feel neglected and exploited. `
You’ve felt like you lost yourself.
Judgment–not curiosity–is the norm.
You feel belittled and ashamed.
You don’t receive empathy.
You’re playing a dysfunctional role.
You feel controlled or manipulated.
You’re living under a cloud of rage.
I believe that fundamentally, toxic relationships are the result of a lack of empathy….when one partner demands that the other partner live up to expectations, or refuses to see things from the other person's perspective. Toxic behavior often represents an inability to feel genuine understanding and compassion for the other person. Toxic relationships can cause feelings of low-self worth, helplessness, fear, anxiety, depression, insecurity, paranoia, and even narcissism.
Eight Signs Someone Is Toxic:
They are sarcastic and deal with conflict in a roundabout way.
Everything is a competition.
You turn everything into a joke.
You want to fix everyone and everything.
You secretly crave disaster because of the care you receive from it.
You think pointing out someone’s flaws will help them change.
You tell them everyone to “just change” their mindset.
You push your truth on others.
If you see any of these signs in your partner then you don’t need to be in a serious relationship with that person because it's a toxic “relationship”.
Ten Tips For A Healthy Relationship:
Keep expectations realistic.Communicate with each other
Take the time
Genuinely listen
Ask questions
Share information
Be flexible
Take care of yourself
Be dependable
Fight Fair
Cool down before talking
Use “I statements”
Keep your language clear and specific
Focus on the current issues
Take responsibility for mistakes
Recognize some problems are not easily solved
Be affirming
Keep life balanced
It’s a process
Be yourself!!
Benji Mallory is a junior at Friendship Collegiate Academy.